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How To Believe In What You Think Is Impossible?

How To Believe In What You Think Is Impossible?

In my last post, I talked about how our beliefs have a tremendous impact in our lives.  So many people hold limiting beliefs of what they’re capable of and what’s possible, which robs people of their full potential and the lives that they could live. I shared my personal experience of how changing my limiting beliefs and my way of thinking empowered me tremendously to transform my life after losing both of my legs and the function of my left arm.

When I began mastering my beliefs and my way of thinking, the restoration of my independence and my life has taken to a whole new level. Through the experience, I have learned that as long as you are convinced that you cannot do something, or that something is impossible, it really is true. But it remains true only as long as you hold on to that belief.

The link to my first post: https://ingalizdenyte.me/2019/08/27/what-beliefs-are-holding-you-back/

In this post, I want to continue: How to Change the Beliefs That Limit Us? How can we do that which we thought we couldn’t do?

What is a belief? A belief is nothing but what we consider to be true, what we feel certain about.

For the most part, beliefs are unconscious, and they come from the culture where we grew up, the philosophy of life, faith / spiritual beliefs, our life experiences or the opinions and experiences of those whom we trust and respect.

Essentially, beliefs are only assumptions we make about ourselves and others, about our circumstances and our destiny, about success and failure, and, other aspects of life. But are our beliefs really true? Unfortunately, the beliefs that we hold may be absolutely not true and they can jeopardize us.

How can I change my beliefs?  

  1. When you think you aren’t able to do something, answer to yourself:
  • How can you absolutely know that to be true? According to whom you are not capable of it?
  • Has there ever been a time when you thought you couldn’t do something and then it turned out it has not been the case?
  • What evidence do you have today which is the opposite of what you believe in?
  • If you would try to do what you thought you could not do, where would you begin?

2. When you face a situation that seems very difficult to resolve, something is impossible, instead of considering how big is the problem consider how mighty your God is.

Usually, when we encounter a problem, we first analyze what is happening, how difficult and how bad everything is, and we check if we can resolve it. And If the problem is beyond our ability to resolve it or it is out of our control we turn to God asking for His help.

BUT if we focus on how big the problem is and build our expectation of the result after the prayer based on our own understanding and viewpoint of what is possible, then it is hard to believe that we will receive help from the Lord after the prayer. “Well… I hope, but this problem is so big, I just can’t see how this can be resolved; I am too weak/too old/not educated/not capable and I don’t know if I can receive a job; he/she are way too stubborn and never going to change,” does it sound familiar?

And then doubt comes, fear and unbelief (and then we get the answer according to our faith). But this is a belief that is based on our assumptions, on our understanding, and not on the word of God. It is faith in our faith, not faith in God.

To me, one of the most prominent examples of what faith is – Abraham and Sarah.

Romans 4:18-22 says that Abraham, even though it seemed hopeless, he still in hope believed. It’s amazing that He did not even consider the realistic factors (that his body and Sarah’s body were way too old to give birth to a child and physically it was simply impossible). Abraham did not waver at the promise of God through unbelief but was strengthened in faith, giving glory to God and being fully convinced that what God has promised He was also able to perform. Sarah – accepted strength to conceive and gave birth to a child because she judged Him faithful who had promised (Hebrews 11:11)

Few details got my attention:

  1. For Abraham and Sarah it was a decision to believe God. It’s a conscious decision.
  2. They built their faith not based on whether it was realistic or believable to them what God has promised but based on WHO GOD IS – God is MIGHTY AND ABLE to do it and He is FAITHFUL to His word.

I personally experienced incredible evidence of the power of faith when I trusted God in hopeless situations and expected an answer, even if it was simply unrealistic to get the answer I wanted. So many times I was advised to think realistically and adapt to circumstances, but I did not want to live as circumstances allowed me. But there was no way to change these circumstances.

And I, feeling complete despair, decided to have a child-like faith that God is the one who is able to change my circumstances. I decided to rise above the realistic thinking and to believe that everything was possible for the Lord, because He created the Universe, and so He is able to change any circumstances. Every day in my prayer I continued telling Him that I knew He is able to do the impossible, and that I trusted Him. I was convinced of this and in hope expected for the answer.

And, you know, the Lord really did the impossible every time. No matter how unrealistic it was to fix those situations, change circumstances and get out of hopelessness, every time I witnessed inexplicable changes in my circumstances. I saw how circumstances changed in an absolutely incredible way, and I just cannot explain it in any logical way, except to tell you: “It was God’s miracle.”

Break your limiting beliefs by deciding to have faith, based not on your understanding of what’s possible, not on what you think how ‘realistic it is’, but having faith in God based on Who God Is and what He says in His Word – HE IS ABLE and HE IS FAITHFUL TO HIS WORD. No matter what in actuality is going on, you stand on God’s word and proclaim it. You proclaim your faith not based on what you see or what you think is possible, but based on what the word of God says. 

3. While holding on to the belief that you can do all things with God and all things are possible with Him, shift your focus from dwelling on how complicated your situation is to seeking for a solution.

Our mind is like a computer – it will give the answer according to our command, which is it will give the answers to the questions we ask ourselves. So it’s critical to ask yourself the question that will lead you to the solution:

  • Where is the solution to this?
  • What would you advise your best friend to do if they were in your situation?
  • If you could do anything, what would you do to fix and improve this situation?
  • If you could do one thing to resolve this situation, what would that be?
  • How could you make it happen, what are the ways?

And then, while holding on to your belief that it is possible and you will have a victory, focus on what you need to do to improve your situation and take action.

Blessings in your journey and until next time! ~ Inga

P.s. I share my personal experience of my life’s transformation in my book “UNSTOPPABLE. It’s a Choice”. Grab your copy to be inspired and empowered to be unstoppable in your pursuits. 

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Posted by on September 18, 2019 in Uncategorized

 

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WHAT BELIEFS ARE HOLDING YOU BACK? WHAT IF THEY ARE NOT TRUE AT ALL?

WHAT BELIEFS ARE HOLDING YOU BACK? WHAT IF THEY ARE NOT TRUE AT ALL?

Many people are not disabled physically, but I see how many of them disable themselves by living in the limiting beliefs of what’s possible, and what they’re capable of. 19 years ago, while I was in a recovery process after the life-altering car accident, I realized one thing that totally transformed the way I began seeing my physical limitations and, and that was the beginning of claiming back my independence and life’s recovery. I want to pass it on to you, so you too, could take a deep breath and spread your wings to the life that you meant to live.

When I fully realized that I no longer had my legs and my left arm was paralyzed with no chance to recover, I was devastated beyond my ability to describe it. It was pure unspeakable anguish and hopelessness. I just couldn’t see how I would be able to live without legs and only one arm. I had many questions about how I was going to take care of myself on a daily basis and live fully. There was one answer – I can’t do it anymore. My mom was helping me to get up, dress up, make a meal and basically, she had to help with everything. I can’t even describe how much I hated to be dependent on another person! But it seemed like this would be my reality for the rest of my life. There was no other way.

Six months after the crash, my mom and I stayed in the Orthopedic Rehabilitation Center to obtain artificial legs for me. I was told that it was impossible for me to walk due to my complicated physical condition. But I believed I would. In fact, I was confident without a doubt that I would. To the astonishment of those who considered it to be impossible I did walk, indeed. One day, as I was resting after my training, I suddenly realized, “Wait a minute. Why am I still asking mom to help me get up? It’s ridiculous – I can do such a difficult thing like walking with prostheses, but I still have my mom helping me with simple daily activities!”

See, in my mind (as well as my mom’s), there was a mindset that without legs and only one arm I was no longer able to do things, so I had to be helped. Now that I had achieved something that professional specialists stated to be impossible, there was a big question mark in my mind about what I was really capable of. Suddenly I realized that my limitations were only in my mind, in my beliefs. I was fully aware that I could do much more than what it seemed at first and I decided to push my limits. That day I declared my independence stating, “Yes, I can do it. I will figure out how to do everything on my own and will become fully self-sufficient.”

From then on, I started looking for ways to do everything on my own. First of all, the goal was to find a way to sit up by myself from a lying position, and with the help of a physical therapist, we found a way.  I began figuring out ways of dressing up independently and performing various daily activities by myself. I didn’t allow myself to think whether I could or could not. My new mindset was – I can without a doubt, I only need to find a way how to do it. Instead of saying to myself, “I am disabled and I can’t do this anymore,” I would say, “Yes, I can and I will find a way to do this.”  I began changing how I speak by eliminating phrases – “I can’t” or “IF I can”. I began refusing to receive any help from my mom (which was not easy for her to accept J ), and I gave myself no other option but to get it done without any help.  When I needed to do something with one hand, holding on to the belief – I can and I will – I asked myself, “HOW can I do this? What is the way? What possible options are there to resolve this?” As simple as it seems, this is the key to how I am able to do things independently. Changing my mindset and asking myself the right questions are the keys to how I managed many of my difficulties in life and overcame all obstacles.

As I look back, changing my way of thinking was one of my biggest breakthroughs which empowered me tremendously and opened the doors to new opportunities.

Since that time, when my limiting beliefs of what I could do and what I thought was possible was replaced by new beliefs, and I began mastering my way of thinking, the restoration of my independence and my life has taken to a whole new level. A few years later, I traveled by myself from Lithuania to the United States to pursue my dream. Now it’s been 14 years that I live across the globe from my family, fully independently (I can take care of all my personal needs, take care of the household matters, laundry, shopping, cooking, going to work, etc.) My physical limitations are still the same BUT BREAKING LIMITATIONS IN MY MIND, IN MY BELIEFS totally transformed what I was able to achieve, and ultimately directed my destiny in a way that is beyond I could ever even dream of.

And what about you? I urge you to look inside yourself and test your deep beliefs. What do you believe and what are you convinced about that it may not be true at all, and this only stops you from trying, from achieving what your heart desires? What belief is holding you back from fulfilling your purpose? As long as you are convinced that something is impossible or that things will not work out for you, it really will be true. But this remains true only as long as you hold on to this belief.

Break through the beliefs that keep you locked in a cage. Do not allow your limiting beliefs to steal the life from you that you are called to live. In your life, there is much more that you can do, fulfill and enjoy!

How to change your beliefs and to do what you thought you couldn’t do? I will share in the next post. Blessings to you, until next time!

 
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Posted by on August 27, 2019 in Uncategorized

 

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Who Will Design Your 2019?

Happy New Year!

As we begin a new year, we all are determined and enthusiastic and hoping this year will be a better year. And then, we get into a routine of daily to-dos, challenges, problems…

Who will end up designing your 2019? Random outside events? …Or YOU?

If you won’t be in charge of how your days go and which direction your year will take, then random events and circumstances will be in charge of your year. You will end up just reacting to whatever happens in your life.

You know, for many years I thought that my life depended on what my circumstances allowed me to do and to experience. I did not really have any aspirations, and I didn’t even think about any goals. I did not even have the concept of having a vision of what I wanted to achieve and deliberately creating what I wanted in my life. My understanding was that my life just depends on whatever happens on a day-to-day basis. With that mindset, I was going nowhere, only daily reacting to random events and the outside world’s impact on my life.

I lived this way until I got into the car accident and my life was brutally changed. Only then I learned that there is another way to live – you can design your life. You can set your mind on what you want to accomplish in your life and deliberately begin fulfilling it. I didn’t know then that this is what I was going to do. I just despised what the crash has created and I deliberately began changing my circumstances. I did what I had never done – I decided what I wanted in order to feel happy, set goals that would lead me to my vision and began living with intention. With time, by achieving one goal after another, I totally changed my life.

Now I know – Life is what you make it. And it begins with your awareness and decision to live with intention.

Don’t allow random outside events to design your year! YOU take the lead.

How? First, ask yourself what you really want.

  • What would make your year meaningful and purposeful?
  • What needs to happen for you to feel confident, truly happy and content?
  • What needs to change so you feel better about yourself and your life?
  • Is there anything you would like to do, to learn or challenge yourself and achieve?
  • What would make your life exciting and fulfilling?
  • What do you think the Lord wants you to fulfill?

Once you know exactly what you want, make a strategy how you’re going to make it happen. What are the possible ways to achieve it? What goals would bring you to your vision? You might say it’s impossible. But please hear me. I’ve been there. The life that I get to live today is not a mere coincidence nor am I just a lucky one. I deliberately aimed for it. And when I started planning how to change my circumstances and restore my life after the car accident, it was hard to even consider that my vision was possible. I was advised many times to think realistically – what I wanted was simply not possible. All circumstances were against me. Everywhere I looked there were tremendous difficulties and unchangeable obstacles in front of me.

But I knew that with God’s help I could change those circumstances. And indeed, when my efforts seemed powerless, the Lord stepped in and in the most incredible way, He arranged favorable situations, connected me with people who were willing to help me, and He created new opportunities where there seemed none. It was unbelievable! What you can’t do the Lord will. Just trust Him. Those who trust in the Lord will never be ashamed. But you need to be bold and step out of your comfort zone and design your year by living on purpose.

Live with intention every day. Always keep in mind where you are headed and be consistent in your efforts to achieve your aspiration. Big changes don’t happen overnight nor does success suddenly show up as ‘Luck’. It takes time. It takes relentless work. It’s your daily choices to make the effort and consistent actions compounded will deliver the successful result.

Please understand – you are the author of your life story. Your year and your life are in your hands, not in the hands of your circumstances or random outside events. With God’s help, you can have an incredible life.

Live with intention.  Make your 2019 an extraordinary year!

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Posted by on January 8, 2019 in Uncategorized

 

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How To Keep on Going?

How To Keep on Going?

Do you have a hardship that it makes you feel like you are reaching your limit and you just can’t take it anymore? Are you facing obstacle that is like unmovable rock and after your continuous, but unavailing efforts you are contemplating on letting it go?
As we go through our life journey, every one of us experience heat and cold, sun and rain, valleys and hills covered with green and flowers, and also the dessert with no water or liveliness. Difficulties are just the same part of life as everything else that we consider good and we are not going to avoid them as much as we would like to. Even if we were absolutely perfect and did not make any mistakes, then there would be an impact from the outside that would cause us problems, right? Some are easier to deal with, and some of them sometimes bring us to the point when we feel like we just can’t take it anymore and we are very close to say “Forget it, I am done with this”. Does that sound familiar to you?

Quite often I am asked “How do you keep on going, Inga? You are so strong, where do you get the strength?” And since it is one of the most frequent questions I am asked, I decided to analyze myself, collect my observations and share it with others.

As I was on my journey of returning back to life by becoming independent and leading a dynamic life again after losing both of my legs and the use of my left arm, I had continuous battles with some serious obstacles, challenges and pain. Losing nearly half of my body at the age of 22 brought an enormous challenge just to function daily, in addition to the enormous emotional and physical pain. Then, life threw at me such challenges that at times it was simply unbearable to live another day. On my way I kept meeting obstacles that ironically smiled at me conveying the message that I won’t be able to move beyond them. Before I successfully achieved my Impossibles (it’s not a mistake; I just made up that word from adjective to a noun in a plural form ), for quite some time my strenuous efforts seemed absolutely meaningless as I did not see the fruit of my labor after countless hours, months and even years of work. The loss, wordless betrayals and disappointments appeared over and over and over…. How do you get up, how do you break through and keep moving on? Sometimes I even asked myself How much more can I take? But then, I would pull myself together and continue my journey toward my ultimate vision.

As I was analyzing what makes me get out of bed in the morning, break through those barrier walls and keep on going, I realized that all these years I was unconsciously applying the same strategies of how I deal with challenges and obstacles that try to prevent me from taking another step. It’s not that I am stronger than you. I just know my source of strength that is my Rock solid foundation and I know strategies to deal with challenges and tools to overcome obstacles. And I applied it. That’s all. I truly sincerely believe that anyone can successfully handle their difficulties. It’s just a matter of knowing and applying. I want to share this with you and others, so you can take it and apply it in your own life.

I will start with the first key, which may seem very invisible at first, but plays incredibly significant role in our lives. When I look back, I see that there was always a very fine line between continuing my life in misery blaming unfortunate events or other people, and me attaining a fully engaged and meaningful life. There is a fine line between some entrepreneurs, like for instance the publisher of Success magazine Darren Hardy, who became highly productive and successful and those who cannot see results that they dream about in their own businesses. There is a fine line between the Australian Christian evangelist and motivational speaker Nick Vujicic , who leads an extraordinary life even though he was born without his legs and without arms and those who are miserable even though they have everything they need to lead a fulfilling life. What was that fine line that made such a big difference in my personal experience and in the lives of many over-comers and high achievers? What can determine which direction our lives will take after some adversity strike us or when just simple daily difficulties take place in our lives?

It’s a Choice.

It was my choice what I decided to do when I was hit by those difficulties. I didn’t think about the power of the choice at the time, I was just totally committed to my ultimate outcome and I was doing everything possible to continue on my journey to implement that outcome. But after certain personal experiences, and observing other successful people, I clearly see that our choices how we handle those challenging times determine what’s next.

All of us have difficulties in our lives, and each of us handle them differently. While we are going through some hardships, we don’t always think about what’s far ahead, because we are focused on the moment and how we feel at that time. Often we make unconscious decisions in order to get away from pain as soon as possible regardless of its subsequent affect later on. But the fact is that our decision during the difficult time of how we are going to look at the situation (choosing the perspective) and what we are going to do about it, will determine what’s next for us. It is our choice during the difficult time whether we are going to allow that hardship to sweep away our decision to pursuit our aim or we are going to push through and continue our pursuit. So it is very important to keep in mind what is our current goal in the progress and what is our ultimate vision, and respond to the hardship in such a way that will support and not jeopardize our desired ultimate outcome.

There is always a choice to step into the victim’s role and blame somebody else for our broken destiny or failure to achieve our goal. At the same time, there is a choice to accept the responsibility for our current circumstances, be determined to make a change and take action to improve our situation. There is always a choice to take an easier route that does not require our efforts and discipline. There is also a choice to make an effort to change our life’s direction and relentlessly work to implement the outcome that we decide to have in our life. There is always a choice to use the given time to entertain ourselves, and a choice to use the same time to do something for the attainment of our goal and fulfilling our purpose. There is a choice to adopt the belief that nothing can be changed and go along with whatever circumstances show up in life, justifying it by “that’s just life” or another very famous one “I guess that’s just my destiny”. Right beside us, there is another choice to believe that there must be a way. With God’s help we will be able to make a change and improve our circumstances, regardless of how bad it is at the time. It’s not occurred events that determine how our lives are supposed to be, but God’s will for us and our decision what we are going to do in each situation. 

At the door of each difficult situation, there are always two choices that are waiting for our pick. These two choices are going to take us on different paths, and each of those choices will deliver totally different results.

“Sure, I would like to make the right choice. But how can I make it, how do I make that step forward, when I just feel tired, frustrated, disappointed, and at times I just don’t want to get out of my bed and do anything…How do I keep going on?”, – you may ask.
Yes, I know. It is very hard to think about things that you need to do when you don’t want another morning to come. This feeling is so familiar to me. But there is a way. I am going to share it with you as we move along.

Today, think about the power of the choice, because the determining factor whether you are going to live your dream or you will remain where you are now is your choices and decisions compound. Know that “I am done with this” or “I don’t feel like doing any of it today” is just simply an emotion, affected by certain events. Today you feel depressed and don’t feel like doing anything, so you decide to stay in bed and watch TV. Tomorrow you feel like you can’t take it anymore and you drop the ball. Another day you feel you need to take it easy, because it has been stressful lately, so you decide to entertain yourself. Time will go by very quickly, and those emotions will pass as well. And where will you be if you make your decision based on your emotions? You will have to live where your choices have brought you.
Is it worth it?
Is it easier to put it off to another day? Yes it is. But again, is it worth it?
Sometimes, our one choice – One Single Choice – can literally direct our life journey one or another direction. Also, our daily, weekly, monthly choices compound deliver their results as well. They may seem quite insignificant, and even they may not even appear like choices. But they are. Every time we decide to do something or not to do is a choice.

Just simply know that while you are going through a hardship, it is best to not allow your emotions to determine your decision what you are going to do with that situation and what you are going to do about your ultimate goal, because if you do – most chances are you will regret about it later. Have a rule to yourself that you are going to move forward relentlessly regardless of obstacles and any hardships that you will meet on your way.

Sure, there are times when some troubles can hit us very hard, and our well-being becomes a priority. (Our physical health, spiritual and emotional well-being is the #1 care, since we won’t be able to have any productivity if we are not doing well, right?) But with that, we need to be honest with ourselves, if this is a really serious issue that must get our care and attention, or is just a simple “feeling down” because we are not in a mood, the weather change or another routine disappointment. I believe the difference can make a person’s understanding that Procrastinating to get things done to “another time” or “when I feel better” is just a simple, invisible and yet dangerous time waster, which delivers an instant relief, but after a period of time brings us the irreversible result – we lose the time that we had to bring our vision to fruition. The longer we wait – the more time we waste, while our projects remain to be not completed. And what’s even worse, by waiting until we feel better we might miss our greatest opportunity. Again, there must be a balance in everything, but it is always good to have that awareness of what is really happening behind our decision “to do it another day.”
During my personal journey, I simply knew that the only way for me to get out of the pit was to be relentless and in spite of it all do everything possible to implement the outcome that I decided to attain. I was always aware that my daily consistent action is a step closer to the realization of my dream, whether it was to walk again or establishing my independent living in the United States. I knew that by canceling my daily work for whatever reason meant I was putting off reaching my ultimate goal to a later as well. In my mind I had a very simple math – doing the work meant getting closer to my goal’s achievement, and procrastinating in my action pushed my goal further away from me. I wanted to reach my goal as soon as possible, so I was committed to do exercises, work hard and just do what I had to do regardless of whether I felt like it or not. When I was facing betrayals and people’s acts that directly and destructively impacted my life, I knew that I could not allow myself to give up on my life only because of another person’s certain act toward me. My life was way too precious for me to allow anybody or anything to stop me from making it blossom again. I moved on because I clearly realized that it’s not other person’s act toward me that could destroy my future, but my choice to give up after that.
Other people and outside events can impact your life and they may even stop you temporarily. However, the ultimate outcome will be determined by you. Are you going to allow your emotions to put your project aside, or are you going to push through and make an effort to do at least something to bring yourself closer to your ultimate aim? Are you going to remain in the pit and wallow in your misery blaming the person or the event, or are you going to shake it off, learn your lessons and move on toward your vision in spite of it all? Are you going to give up when challenges show up, or are you going to break through and reach your destination anyway?
It’s your choice.
Lay a firm foundation for yourself that you will always make a choice that will align with your purpose. You will always make a choice to overcome and do the best you can in any circumstances. Make a non-negotiable decision that you will never give up, no matter what it takes for you to take another step. So when you face some tough situation, don’t rush to do anything out automatic reaction. A lot of times we just react, making unconscious choices based on our habitual mental patterns. Stop. Make a conscious decision. Think about the situation in a big picture. Where are you going? Try to see those two choices, and ask yourself “The choice that I am going to make now, where will it bring me ultimately?”

What is that beautiful place in your life where you are headed? Look how far you have made it! I am sure you have had some obstacles on your way before you got here. And today, one of the combining reasons why you are successful or have not reach your desired outcome is how you dealt with those hardships and stumbling blocks, would you agree?

Today is your opportunity of many choices. Tomorrow is a new day, which is a new opportunity to use your given time and make choices that will get you closer to your vision, or away from it. Your own choice will determine it.
Life is like an art piece. Our decisions shape and consistent daily actions create this unique piece of art. Make your life a masterpiece.

I hope this add some value to you. I cannot stress enough how important it is. If you would like to share with me and other readers your thoughts, feedback and your experiences by posting right below, I would be absolutely delighted to hear from you! Also, please pass this on to others, if you know someone who might benefit from it.

I will continue sharing with you How to break through and keep on going. Until then, use what you just read. It will make a difference.

Here are few questions that you may ask yourself to help you:

  • Choices that I am making during difficult times – do they work for me or against me? Are they bringing me closer to my goal? If not, what different choices do I need to make in order to start consistently moving forward?
  • The choice that I will make now – is it going to bring me closer to my ultimate vision or pull me away from it?

If you would like to have some support through the coaching process, I am just an email away. Please email me inga.lizdenyte@gmail.com

And like always, I wish you to Be Strong. Be Determined and Persistent. Be Unstoppable! 

~ Yours, Inga

http://www.ingalizdenyte.com/Coaching.html

 

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